Memories

Everything i know
and have
is a memory, past thing
everything there’s left anymore
is this nostalgia
memories all over again in my head
like i’m stuck in the movies
not really living the live that’s happening outside
i’m not part of this thing
this what they call the present
and i don’t intend to be
part of that what they call the future

some of my memories aren’t even real
they are dreams and nightmares and feelings
they are collection of little stones from the shore
that i’ve just picked up, put them in my pockets
i might not have even been present fully
might not have felt anything
but that collection is all i have
and nostalgia colours those stones
makes them prettier than they were
when i picked them
nostalgia makes me carry those pretty little stones, thoughts
and they’re already getting heavy
(or am i getting weaker)

i can’t let go
i can’t let them go
memories are all that’s left, all that i have
everything is a memory of something
(and longing for somewhere)
there’s no present and there’s no future

not for me anyway.

Kuva: Sami Salmela, työn nimi: Poisonous
Runo: Elisa

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